Curhat Colongan

Darling, I Do

2011-12-01T10:39:00.002+07:00

Golden leaves looked brown to me
The world had less color without you
Shapes in the sky looked plain to my eyes
The world had less color without you

I know plenty of people with eyes closed
They don't see you like I do
Darling, I do

Notes on the keys meant nothing to me
The world didn't sing without you
Birds in the trees fell silent for me
The world didn't sing without you

I know plenty of people with eyes closed
They don't see you like I do
Darling, I do

Darling, I do see you

**Landon Pigg**

A Prayer Away

2011-11-10T09:56:00.002+07:00

I'm tired and shrouded in fear
I sit still and unloose things I cannot bear
I can't see You, but somehow I know You're near
Your soothing voice echoing around in silence is all I hear

I believe...
always believe,

You are just a prayer away.

A Chat with Jesus Christ...

2011-10-11T22:23:00.005+07:00

(taken from a friend's post - by: Aries Quismundo)

Jesus: Hello, did you call me?

Man: Called you? No. Who's this?

Jesus: This is Jesus. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.

Man: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now. I'm in the midst of something.

Jesus: What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.

Man: Don't know. But I can't find free time. Life has become hectic. It's rush hour all the time.

Jesus: Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results. Activity consumes times. Productivity frees it.

Man: I understand. But I still can't figure out. By the way, I was not expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging chat.

Jesus: Well, I wanted to resolve your fight for time, by giving you some clarity. In this net era, I wanted to reach you through the medium you are comfortable with.

Man: Tell me, why has life become complicated now?

Jesus: Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is what makes it complicated.

Man: Why are we then constantly unhappy?

Jesus: Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. You are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying has become your habit. That's why you are not happy.

Man: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?

Jesus: Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.

Man: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty.

Jesus: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.

Man: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?

Jesus: Diamond cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people go through trials, but don't suffer. With the experience their life become better, not bitter.

Man: You mean to say such experience is useful?

Jesus: Yes. In every term, experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test first, and the lessons afterwards.

Man: But still, why should we go through such tests? Why can't we be free from problems?

Jesus: PROBLEMS are Purposeful Roadblocks Offering Beneficial Lessons (to) Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you are free from problems.

Man: Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we don't know where we are heading.

Jesus: If you look outside, you will not know where you are heading. Look inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.

Man: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurt more than moving in the right direction. What should I do?

Jesus: Success is a measure as decided by others. Satisfaction is a measure as decided by you. Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than knowing you rode ahead. You work with the compass. Let others work with the clock.

Man: In tough times, how do you stay motivated?

Jesus: Always look at how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. Always count your blessing, not what you are missing.

Man: What surprises you about people?

Jesus: When they suffer they ask, "why me?" When they prosper they never ask "why me" Everyone wishes to have truth on their side, but few want to be on the side of the truth.

Man: Sometimes I ask, who I am, why am I here. I can't get the answer.

Jesus: Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be. Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here. Create it. Life is not a process of discovery but a process of creation.

Man: How can I get the best out of life?

Jesus: Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear.

Man: One last question. Sometimes I feel my prayers are not answered.

Jesus: There are no unanswered prayers. At times the answer is NO.

Man: Thank you for this wonderful chat. I am so happy to start the day with a new sense of inspiration.

Jesus: Well, keep the faith and drop the fear. Don't believe your doubts and doubt your beliefs. Life is a mystery to solve, not a problem to resolve. Trust me. Life is wonderful if you know how to live.

Man: Thank you so much.

Jesus: You are always welcome. Have a good day, my friend.

***

Your name popped up on my screen, and my heart literally skipped a beat

2011-10-10T13:31:00.003+07:00

Your name popped up on my screen,

and my heart literally skipped a beat.

You make my day even more colorful :)

I'm happy... just happy!

no 'what if' or 'if only'...

I just want to live in this present :)

Period

It's Been Over a Year

2011-04-19T20:53:00.005+07:00

It's been more than a year, however, I still can feel you

I dream about you sometimes.. never scary :)

I know you won't do such things to me :)

I think about you often... though I never talk to others about this..

I like to recall you.

I miss our conversations, our little fight, calling you on the weekend..

I really miss those things...

I really really try to remember what was the prayer letter you asked me to read in my dream that day.. but I couldn't..

m kinda sad because of that.. :(

And I don't know why... tonight I miss you so badly, Om :(

It's quite mess down here, you know.... I'm afraid it can't be repaired..

Time is ticking.. somehow I have a feeling, there's not much time left.

There shouldn't be another loss to gain peace and happiness among us, don't you think?

It's been over a year.. and you have appeared couple times.. I did enjoyed all of 'em..

And still I hope to get another vision of you.. again and again.. :)

Well.. that's all for now, I feel much better now...

TTYL, Om.

(Om John Rinaldy, 17 March 2010 - 17 March 2011)

Pergilah Kau

2010-10-25T22:31:00.005+07:00

Tak mau lagi aku percaya
Pada semua kasih sayangmu
Tak mau lagi aku tersentuh
Pada semua pengakuanmu

Kau takkan mengerti rasa sakit ini
Kebohongan dari mulut manismu

Pergilah kau!
Pergi dari hidupku
Bawalah semua rasa bersalahmu

Pergilah kau!
Pergi dari hidupku
Bawalah rahasiamu yang tak ingin kutahui

Tak mau lagi aku terjerat
Pada semua janji-janjimu
Tak mau lagi aku terpaut
Pada semua permainanmu

Kamu takkan mengerti rasa sakit ini
Kebohongan dari mulut manismu

Pergilah kau!
Pergi dari hidupku
Bawalah semua rasa bersalahmu

Pergilah kau!
Pergi dari hidupku
Bawalah rahasiamu yang tak ingin kutahui

Bertahun-tahun bersama
Kupercayaimu
Kubanggakan kamu
Kuberikan segalanya
Aku tak mau lagi
Ku tak mau lagi...

Pergilah kau!
Pergi dari hidupku
Bawalah semua rasa bersalahmu

Pergilah kau!
Pergi dari hidupku
Bawalah rahasiamu yang tak ingin kutahui

**by Sherina**

Suara Nurani

2010-10-03T15:25:00.002+07:00

Setiap lewat di perempatan matraman, dari arah proklamasi menuju pramuka, di sisi kiri jalan ada gedung ABDI, Alat Bantu Dengar Indonesia. Refleks langsung terpikir untuk mampir, beliin untuk om PS..

Sama sekali ngga ingat sekarang hanya dengan bisikan doa, om pasti bisa mendengar.

Beberapa kali mimpi tentang ci Olly, selalu ada ekspresi unik cici, yang setengah manyun digodain mama, atau ko Roni, atau alm om J. Sesaat terbangun, refleks lagi ambil hp, sms isengin cici ah... :)

Sekali lagi lupa, cici punya "jalur telkom" spesial.. tak teraih dari network Telkomsel.

Memang baru setahun tangan tak lagi dapat menjabat, tapi beban rindu ini telah membukit dan demikian berat.

Memang sudah setahun kami terpisah alam dan raga, tapi rasa itu selalu ada.
Ikatan ini terlalu erat untuk diceraikan.

Kita memang tak lagi bisa menyentuh, memeluk dan menatap..
Namun komunikasi hati dengan hati tetap terjalin.
Suara fisik itu tak nyata terdengar, mungkin karena nurani mengajaknya menetap.

Just listen to our heart, then we listen those voices still talking and whispering gently, ask us to keep moving forward in life and never give up. Love you om and cici... forever and always.

(30 September 2009 - 30 September 2010)

lima menit

2010-09-10T14:22:00.007+07:00

langit berawan, berujung hujan
semilir angin berhembus pelan
kurasa dingin yang tertahan...

kala raga terhalang jarak
hati merapat hangat,
bersama rindu yang marak

cukup lima menit siang ini
sapaanmu menghalau sepi
terebak senyum nurani

membuat sabar hati menanti
detik-detik bertemu lagi...

Breathe Again

2010-07-31T12:41:00.005+07:00

Have you wondered how it feels when it's all over?
Wondered how it feels when you just have to start anew...
Never knowing where you're going
When you face a brand new day
It used to be that way
Now I just close my eyes and say...

I just want to breathe again..
Learn to face the joy and pain
Discover how to laugh a little, cry a little
Live a little more

I just wanna face the day
Forget about the woes of yesterday
Maybe if I hope a little, try a little more..
I'll breathe again

Starting out again is never easy
Disappointments come and go but life still moves on
With a bit of luck...
It's a brand new start
That might just work my way
No need to walk away...
Don't want to live a life's replay

Things will work out fine
If you can find the courage to look past the night
To see the break of dawn

I just want to breathe again
Learn to face the joy and pain
Discover how to laugh a little, cry a little
Live a little more
I just wanna face the day
Forget about the woes of yesterday
Maybe if I hope a little, try a little more

I'll breathe again...

(Ning)

Forgiven, not Forgotten

2010-07-28T23:52:00.012+07:00

"Sorry...., it's all that you can say..."

Yap.... sorry was all that you could say...
You were definitely not singing that time,
"I'm serious........." (with a long pause.....)
But why.. it sounds.. meaningless?

I might say, it touched me a bit, the way you said it..
But then... something just popped into my head,
'what kind of crap are you!'

Still you said "I don't wanna lose you"..
And still I forgive you.. this is not because I'm good, but I'm stupid..
Stupid enough to think that you are 'the new you'..
Silly enough to hope that you will change..

Well...you are not, and you never will..... :)
You're just trapped in the same situation, with a different cast.
I thought I could never understand you, but somehow I know you quite well.

One thing I regret...
When you uttered your second sorry,
I should have replied, "You're forgiven, not forgotten."

"Hope you pay the price."

Kutipan Sahabatku

2010-04-29T20:49:00.004+07:00

Ketika kumohon pada Allah kekuatan,
Ia memberiku kesulitan agar aku menjadi kuat.

Ketika kumohon kebijaksanaan,
Ia memberiku masalah untuk dipecahkan.

Ketika kumohon kesejahteraan,
Ia memberiku akal untuk berpikir.

Ketika kumohon keberanian,
Ia memberiku kondisi bahaya untuk kuatasi.

Ketika kumohon satu cinta,
Ia memberiku sesama untuk kutolong.

Ketika kumohon bantuan,
Ia memberiku kesempatan.

Aku tidak selalu menerima apa yang kuminta,
tapi aku menerima segala yang kubutuhkan..

The Final Conversation

2010-03-19T09:26:00.008+07:00

Our last conversation was about how you encouraged me to keep on biking and enjoyed my vacation :)
That was the last time I heard you laughed and made silly jokes... but those were still funny :)

I was happy...
"Keep up your spirit, Om!"
And you said, "3 more months, you will see me walking proudly to say that I am fully recovered."

But the next scene I saw was your stiff body, lying in the coffin with so many flowers from beloved people, families and friends.
I heard the endless sobs, and saw those sad faces .. people came to mourn..
I just stood there.. looked at the photo with your favourite unique pose.

I was so sad, Om.. when I entered that ICU room... knowing that I might not have enough time.
I couldn't stop crying when I saw your weakened heartbeat on the monitor.
And finally it reached zero.

"Searching pulse....."

No pulse.....

I can't see souls, Om..
But in a split second seemed like I saw your free and bright soul dancing happily and smiled.

You are OK now, Om.. totally recovered.

I don't really care what has happened in the last 5 months.
All conflicts, rejection, pain, sadness, denials and regrets.

You have gone anyway....
You have chosen your way.

In the end, you returned to Him, and nobody but Him.

Bye, Om...

Thank you for letting me hold you till the last breath.

(Oom John Rinaldy - 17 March 2010)

Prayer

2010-03-15T16:50:00.003+07:00

- St. Ignatius of Loyola -

Dearest Lord,

teach me to be generous,

teach me to serve You as You deserve,

to give and not to count the cost,

to fight and not to heed the wounds,

to toil and not to seek for rest,

to labour and not to seek for reward,

save that of knowing, i do Your most holy will.

Rasa

2009-12-06T17:02:00.003+07:00

kala rasa itu datang menerpa

akal tak mampu merancang dusta

lelah hati sesaat sirna

hanya kalbu tertambat rasa

Langitkuw Kelabuw

2009-09-23T22:03:00.004+07:00

baru saja kututup buku itu

ta sadar aku terpaku..

menatap tanggalan merah berganti biru

pertanda liburanku telah berlalu...

aku tau...

esok langit pasti jadi kelabu :(

bukan lagi semarak biru

bertumpuk kerjaan telah menunggu

report ini dan ituuu...

sing sabar ya otakkuuuuuuuuuuuww.... :((

You'll Be In My Heart

2009-09-21T15:45:00.004+07:00

(and the song speaks...)

Come stop your crying, It will be alright..

Just take my hand, hold it tight..

I will protect you

from all around you

I will be here, don't you cry..

For one so small, you seem so strong

My arms will hold you, keep you safe and warm

This bond between us, can't be broken

I will be here, don't you cry..

'Cause you'll be in my heart

You'll be in my heart

From this day on.. now and forever more..

You'll be in my heart

no matter what they say..

Yes you'll be in my heart... always..

Why can't they understand the way we feel ?

They just don't trust what they can't explain..

I know we're different..

but deep inside us..

we're not that different at all..

And you'll be in my heart

Yes, you'll be in my heart

From this day on.. now and forever more..

Don't listen to them, 'cause what do they know ?

We need each other to have to hold..

They'll see in time...

I know..

When destiny calls you, you must be strong

I may not be with you, but you've got to hold on

They'll see in time...

I know..

'Cause you'll be in my heart

no matter what they say..

You'll be in my heart..

Always..

(Phil Collins)

Capek

2009-09-05T13:38:00.001+07:00

Sometimes I just want to fall asleep,
and never wake up...

yang artinya ....

2009-08-15T21:46:00.004+07:00

Fajar telah mulai menyingsing

Engkau semakin jauh berjalan

Langkah kakimu kian mantap

Irama lagumu menggugah kalbu

Cahaya indah kemilau...

Ikuti kemana arah membawamu

Tatapanmu nan tajam

Air mukamu tenang...

Setenang air di telaga

(thanks, bu Yuli)

November 1990

Cape' deee....

2009-07-21T19:11:00.002+07:00

(hasil browsing di Immanuel ^_^)

Cape dee.....

udah dibilang, ga mau denger..
udah denger, ga mau ngerti..
udah ngerti, ga mau nanya..
udah nanya, ga mau ngerjain..
udah ngerjain..salah pula....
udah salah, ga mau ngaku..
udah ngaku, ga mau b'rubah..
udah b'rubah, tapi hati ga seneng..
udah ga seneng.. ga mau ngomong pula.....

"Apapun yang kamu perbuat, perbuatlah dengan segenap hatimu...seperti untuk Tuhan dan bukan untuk manusia" (Kol 3:23)

Pundi-Pundi Sang Kacung

2009-07-14T18:37:00.005+07:00

pundi-pundi sang kacung...
cukup laah buat makan di warung
menunya krupuk en rebung
plus nasi sementung..... :)

ambisi si kacung...
hidup tenang, s'lalu b'runtung...
s'lama duit bulanan bisa ditabung..
en genk mentunk masi tetep gemblung
lanjutkan saja pertarungan ini, bung !!!

:)

Ciledug

2009-06-29T14:28:00.003+07:00

Ciledug....Ciledug.....

Jauhnya euuuuyy.....bikin mabug...

Nyampe di tempat..cuma dudug-dudug...

Nungguin tumjahe kerja...malah ngantug....

Ciledug....Ciledug.....
Jalanannya muacettt... jadi suntug...
Angkot plus Mikrolet... uuuhhh...blegug !!!!

NOT

2009-05-02T15:56:00.008+07:00

satu kata
ada makna

satu nama
beragam warna

satu wanita
banyak cerita

satu jiwa
penuh asa

satu cinta
untuk Tia

............

satu doa
slalu dipinta

"Hyang Esa,
kuingin bahagia"

Not..
Jangan kalut..
Kamulah cinta-Nya
Percaya saja..
Jalan-Nya SEMPURNA

***

(Not.... "Uda Disaosin" yuuuuuuuu......muachhhh..... ^_^)

Leave Out All The Rest

2009-04-20T17:00:00.005+07:00

(Linkin Park)

I dreamed I was missing, you were so scared

But no one would listen, 'cause no one else cared

After my dreaming, I woke with this fear

What am I leaving when I'm done here?

So if you're asking me, I want you to know

When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done

Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed

Don't resent me, and when you're feeling empty

Keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest

Leave out all the rest, don't be afraid

I've taken my beating, I've shared what I made

I'm strong on the surface, not all the way through

I've never been perfect, but neither have you

So if you're asking me, I want you to know

When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done

Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed

Don't resent me, and when you're feeling empty

Keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside you've learned to hide it so well

Pretending someone else can come and save me from myself

I can't be who you are

When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done

Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed

Don't resent me, and when you're feeling empty

Keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest

Leave out all the rest...

Ulang Tahun Dara

2009-04-12T10:19:00.002+07:00

Hari ini genap masanya..
Sang gadis selangkah lebih dewasa
Bertaut gundah, saat ini tetaplah istimewa
Angka 25 penuh arti, penuh makna

Janganlah resah kau, dara...
Akan selalu ada banyak cinta..
Hatimu ta'kan merana...

Happy Birthday, Tootsky.... muaachhh... :)

IBU

2009-04-02T22:13:00.004+07:00

Arti IBU dalam hidup:
IBU adalah orang yang serba kekurangan.
Dia kurang pandai dalam menghitung kesalahan-kesalahan anaknya...
Dia kurang mampu mengingat beban hidup akibat perbuatan-perbuatan anaknya...
Dia kekurangan waktu untuk dirinya sendiri.. karena seluruh waktu adalah milik anaknya...

Semoga masih ada waktu untuk membahagiakan IBU...

Happy Birthday, Mama...

Who-Ville Citizens

2009-03-30T10:38:00.005+07:00

Dear Folks,

Has anyone read Dr Seuss - Horton Hears a Who? It's an interesting story, so funny, so meaningful, lots of lesson. It tells about a caring, kindhearted elephant named Horton, who hears a tiny yelp coming from the dust speck that floated past him in the air. Believing that somebody might be living in it, he gives all his effort to keep the speck save. In fact, the dust speck indeed a universe for such microscopic creatures led by Ned McDodd, the mayor of Who-Ville, who enlists all of his people to make noise by shouting, "WE ARE HERE!", so everyone can hear them.

Lately I've been thinking, that we are the real Who-Ville citizens... aren't we? Shouting, "We are here!", but still no one up there attempt to hear us. Pretending that we're not really exist... that we're nothing. And you... Gentlemen... think that you could control our destiny and keep playing with our lives.

But that's OK... we should thank all of you anyway....

'Cause it makes us that much stronger..

Makes us work a little bit harder..

Makes us that much wiser..

So thanks for making us FIGHTERS!!!

(Fighter by Christina Aguilera)

"A person's a person, no matter how small"

M.U

2009-02-20T13:11:00.016+07:00

same name, different story
overcome the world in unity
trying hard to bring back the glory
nearly loosing our sanity
but still unified as family

people know Alex Ferguson as lead
but here we're proud to have Didit
shows the world of what we did
with special things in it

things that will adhere
and proudly we might declare
in spite of all the nightmares
we truly learn how

to share...

to forgive...

to love...

to speak...

to balance life...

to respect the nature...

to live healthy...

to work as a team...

to dream to be a leader...

to have fun and enjoy parties...

to be a good singer!!

to Xpress ourselves ;)

to let go.......
(too many farewell pics to be posted..... can't choose even one....**sighh....**)

to stay connected!!

to appreciate friendship !!

the ball has reached the gate
the time has come to the limit
but what we have is to commit
wherever we are, let's stay connected ! :)

-Tribute to Didit Herawan-

We won't say goodbye pak, for our paths might cross again someday. Goodluck for your dissertation (jia you paaaak !!!!!) and may you have a happy ever after life with beloving family.

**again...by m.o.i & ladybug**

Dua Sahabat

2009-02-13T15:46:00.003+07:00

dua sahabat

berdebat tapi tetap hangat

erat...berjabat

walau hela nafas berat

dua sahabat
kalo ngomong muncrat-muncrat
kadang-kadang bikin bohwat
untung ga ada perang granat

dua sahabat
tiap hari lempar damprat
daripada bradu hujat
mending balik..adu pantat!

(dedicated to mamakLIST and her very diagonal best friend)

**lopyuolwesmakmuachhmuachhPIIIIIISSSSSSSheheee**
-m.o.i & ladybug-

Mahluk Ambisius yang Mutungan

2009-02-03T15:58:00.005+07:00

tersebutlah sebongkah jiwa yang berakal

dengan pongah mengaku berintelektual

lugas berkata, bercerita dan membual

mengumbar kemegahan diri serasa tak bercela
haus kuasa dan pengukuhan strata

s'lalu gigih berusaha
dengan menghalalkan segala cara

bertingkah layaknya anak manja
lihai merajuk dan bersandiwara
merasa bangga atas kemampuannya berlaga
hingga melupakan tata krama

pandai ber-taichi mengalihkan kesalahan
sungguh menjiwai lakon "makan teman"
ambisi tinggi, bergaya arogan
sering blingsatan bak kesetanan

benar-benar sungguh men-jijay-kan..
bagiku kau tak lain, tak bukan...
hanya mahluk ambisius yang mutungan !!

Dreams

2009-01-25T00:09:00.007+07:00

I have been dreaming a lot lately...vivid ones

Kind of dreams that not only appeared once

Amazing and also horrifying

About nature changeover..

That so pleasant and calm initially, but turned vicious abruptly

Left me breathless, and woke up covered in sweat

Those visions remain undone, and raise my deepest biggest fear

Then about people...

Those who hardly ever meet

And those who do not at the top priority of my interest

But always offer me the constantly wonderful days

It makes me starting to look at them differently

Or should I say, more enthusiastically?

Though sometimes I feel it shouldn't be like this

I'm overreacting!

The nightmares have confused me...

On the contrary, a part of me is longing for those dreams to re-appear

I'm scared, but still I can't resist the weird sensations

And for the time being, I need to learn to keep using my common sense

I have to ...

Jacob Bunardi

2009-01-16T21:11:00.004+07:00

Om...
Setahun kemarin kami melepasmu
Bersimbah air mata dan lidah yang kelu
Dengan asa lunglai layu
Saat kau hentikan nafasmu

Selama setahun perjalanan tanpamu
Hidup kami tetap melaju
Peristiwa demi peristiwa berlalu
Tetap kenanganmu ada di kalbu

Dan kini kami ungkapkan
Kerinduan dan kerelaan
Disertai keteguhan iman
Demi kebahagiaanmu dalam Tuhan

Rasanya tidaklah berlebihan
Bila angan menjadi keyakinan...
Satu saat.. kita pasti dipertemukan...

(Mengenang 1 tahun kepergian Om Bun. Semoga jiwanya di Api Pencucian menerima kemurahan hati Allah dan dapat berbahagia bersamaNya di surga)

Resolusi 2009

2009-01-06T16:21:00.003+07:00

1. Belajar gitar

2. Ngurusin badan 2 kg lagi dehh

3. CARI PROJECT LAGIIIIIIIIIII !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HIDUP ADALAH PERJUANGAN !!!
(hehehee...ini lagi stress ato apa siiy??)

...31 Desember...

2008-12-31T12:13:00.004+07:00

Meneropong kembali peristiwa sepanjang tahun...

Kejadian yang sangat pantas disyukuri atau disesali...

Kenangan yang tak mudah dan tak ingin dilupakan...

Rasa yang datang lalu hilang...

2008, bagiku adalah tahun penuh kejutan. Kejutan bahagia dan menyedihkan. Begitu banyak kejadian..segala kemudahan dan juga kehilangan. Tak bisa kutentukan mana yang lebih banyak. Karena aku subyektif, tidak konsisten, labil. Setiap hal yang kualami akan mengubah gerak neraca nalarku.

Letupan sukacita sejak tahun baru dimulai, tetap ada hingga penghujung tahun ini. Pengalaman bertualang, memahami sosok-sosok baru, walau tak mudah tapi sangat menyenangkan. Dan di balik duka, reuni keluarga jadi momen yang berharga.

Namun berturut-turut kehilangan saudara, teman, sahabat terbaik, yang tersayang, sungguh menyakitkan. Sulit diungkapkan, rasanya kosong, perih, menguras energi. Yang mampu kulakukan hanya menangis, lalu tidur. Hanya itu pelampiasannya. Kemudian terbangun, tenang, ada asa baru. Sepertinya aneh, karena semuanya berulang, kelelahan jiwaku akan timbul lagi.

Kesempatan, keberuntungan datang padaku. Kuterima dan kujalani.... lalu aku bimbang. Tentu aku sangat berterima kasih padaNya, tapi hatiku tetap bertanya. Seandainya kulepaskan, seperti apa jadinya? Kenyataan yang lebih indah? Atau malahan tertusuk lebih dalam?

Kadang aku takut dalam kegembiraanku. Aku kalut dalam sukacitaku. Seperti gravitasi bumi, semakin tinggi aku melompat, semakin sakit rasanya ketika jatuh. Dan aku tak siap menerima lukaku, dan seringkali menarik orang-orang tercintaku terluka bersama.

Sungguh tidak adil... dan aku menyesal.

Menggurui batin sendiri ternyata sulit. Saat rasio berkata, 'segala sesuatunya terjadi karena sebuah alasan', seketika pula hatiku menyela, 'apa alasannya??'. Tak ada yang mau mengalah sampai keduanya lelah. Lelah, atau pasrah... entahlah...

Hanya bila ketenangan tiba-tiba melingkupi, aku merasa tak perlu memikirkan alasan apapun.

Jalani saja semampuku. Lintasan permadani lembut atau hamparan kerikil sesudahnya. Nikmati dan hadapi, hidup selalu berubah, memang penuh kejutan.

Besok, tahun depan, akan selalu terjadi perubahan... aku pun begitu. Mungkin nyata terlihat atau samar tak terasa. Seperti jerawat kecil yang gemar berpindah tempat di daguku, guratan keriput yang mulai berbaris rapi di keningku, atau kantung mataku yang menebal sehabis ngeronda. Seperti rinduku pulang ke rumah, emosiku selama PMS :) atau... caraku menatapnya.

Akan berubah...

Seperti apa?

Kali ini rasio dan hatiku sepakat, ngga perlu adu debat.

Keduanya berkolaborasi, saling menentramkan.

Mendukungku melangkah satu-satu.

Kupandangi lagi angka itu, di lembar terakhir kalender kamarku.

hmmm........

Aku belum beli kalender baru............

Anyway, Happy New Year!

Happy Christmas

2008-12-25T13:54:00.003+07:00

I'm trying to find some simple lines about what I really feel every Christmas. But somehow it is quite difficult to write it down. Till I heard this song sang by John Lennon. It's perfect, for our reflections. My reflection.... Happy Christmas!

So this is Christmas, and what have you done?

Another year over, and a new one just begun

And so this is Christmas, I hope you have fun

The near and the dear ones, the old and the young

A very Merry Christmas and a happy New Year

Let's hope it's a good one without any fear

And so this is Christmas, for weak and for strong

For rich and the poor ones

The war is so long...

And so Happy Christmas

For black and for white

For yellow and red ones

Let's stop all the fight...

A very Merry Christmas and a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one without any fear

So this is Christmas, and what have we done?
Another year over, and a new one just begun

Buntelan Maaf

2008-12-22T22:38:00.004+07:00

ufff.........

kuberi lagi untukmu

selembar, bahkan sekotak maaf...

diiringi helaan nafasku

'tuk membungkam s'gala rayumu

asal kau tau...
semua permainanmu itu...
sungguh membuatku jengah
aku lelah.......

tetapi..
menahun kupelajari...
kamu tak menyadari...
dan tak pernah mengerti..
aku yang harus memahami
kamu penuh teka-teki

hingga kesabaran kulatih
meski langkahku tertatih
dan luka jatuh terasa perih

sekali lagi tetap kumaklumi
coba-cobamu hanya untuk rekreasi
dan buntelan maafku s'lalu terisi

siap GRATISSSS kubagi
setiap kali kau berkata, "Sorry......"

**thanks to neng Iin for the short deep discussion :) **

The Man In The Mirror

2008-12-09T18:37:00.004+07:00

Start to make a change from 'the man in the mirror'....

(Sang by Michael Jackson)

I'm gonna make a change for once in my life
It's gonna be real good, gonna make a difference, gonna make it right....

As I turn up the collar on my favourite winter coat
This wind is blowin' my mind
I see the kids in the street with not enough eat...

Who am I to be blind?
Pretending not to see their needs
A summers disregard, a broken bottle up, and a one man's soul
They follow each other on the wind ya' know
'Cause they got nowhere to go
That's why I want you to know

I'm starting with the man in the mirror
I'm asking him to change his ways
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make a world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make a change !!

I've been a victim of a selfish kind of love
It's time that I realize that there are some with no home, not a nickel to loan
Could it be really me pretending that they're not alone ?

A willow deeply scarred somebody's broken heart and a washed-out dream
They follow the pattern of the wind ya' see
'Cause they got no place to be
That's why I'm starting with me

I'm starting with a man in the mirror
I'm asking him to change his ways
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make a world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make a change !!

Ngga boleh pake 'Haduh'....

2008-12-06T14:54:00.004+07:00

Senin minggu lalu, di lapangan tenis, saya latihan serve dipandu pak pelatih. Mungkin memang ngga berjiwa atlet (hehee..) walaupun sudah 3 tahunan ikut latihan, teteeup aja ngga ada kemajuan. Buat forehand sih lumayan lah, tapi backhand dan service...alamaaak...susah kaliii...

Sudah berbola-bola saya pukul tapi perbandingan bola in & out 1:20, hahaaa.. Dan setiap kali mukul, selalu keceplos, 'haduuh...out...haduuh..salah..'.
Tiba-tiba, pak pelatih nyeletuk, "Hayoo...ngga boleh pake 'haduh', pasti nanti masuk..."
And what a miracle, everytime he said that, the ball was in...

hmm... :) lucu juga... komentar ringannya justru sangat bermakna...

Tanpa sadar, dalam 1 hari tak terhitung berapa kali kita melontarkan kata 'duh' dengan beragam versinya, 'duh, haduh, waduh, hadoooh, uuuuh, waaa waaaa waaaaaaaaa' (yang terakhir itu apa ya??? hehe...).
Entah itu sekedar ekspresi, emosi sesaat atau memang kita betul-betul sedang kesal... bisa jadi kata itu sudah masuk ke alam bawah sadar kita dan bercokol selamanya di sana.
Sepertinya kita tak pernah berhenti mengeluh. Dalam situasi apapun, kita selalu mengeluh.
Susah sedikit, haduuh.... ribet sedikit, haduuh... sedih sedikit, haduuh... Rasanya hidup selalu penuh dengan beban. Kita sering lupa, setiap individu memanggul beban dengan takarannya masing-masing. Ngga lebih, ngga kurang. Yang di Atas itu Maha adil, Hakim Agung sejati. Mungkin juga kita kurang bersyukur, atas apa yang telah terjadi, yang kita miliki.

Nasehat pak pelatih, sejak hari itu, selalu melintas di benak, setiap kali saya lunglai, putus asa, mulai mengeluh lagi, eh...... terngiang, "hayoo, ngga boleh pake 'haduh'..." :) :) Saya jadi tersenyum.

Memang, hidup perlu ada beban,harus ada beban, kalo ngga ada, kita ngga belajar bertanggung jawab... tapi rasanya akan lebih ringan dan lebih indah, bila syukur padaNya tak pernah lupa diungkapkan.

("Marilah kepadaKu, semua yang letih lesu dan berbeban berat, Aku akan memberi kelegaan kepadamu")

Awanku.... Gulaliku.....

2008-11-25T13:38:00.004+07:00

kadang putih bercampur hitam dan kelabu
kalau dipandang lagi, tampaklah kuning dan ungu
begitu banyak warna diadu
tapi tetap tampak menyatu

selalu ada saatku
memandangmu berarak pelan dan berlalu
dari layar lebar jendela kantorku

kadang kau tampak lucu menggemaskan
namun tak jarang terlihat menakutkan
sekali waktu beriring manis seluas pandang
atau berkejaran tertiup angin kencang

dikatakan langit cerah tanpa awan
namun tanpamu langit tidaklah rupawan
bagiku kau sungguh menawan
memandangmu membuatku nyaman
atau memang kuteringat cemilan ??

tebal tipis warna-warni...

kamu awan...atau gulali..... ???

"Kamu lakukan untuknya, kamu lakukan untukKu"

2008-11-23T12:29:00.008+07:00

Terbangun kaget sore-sore kemarin, koq rasanya pengen ikutan misa sore. Langsung mandi plus dandan dikit, brangkat lah saya ke Gereja Kristus Raja, Pejompongan. Misanya mulai jam 17.30. Romo Rohadi mimpin misa. Walaupun lagi pilek, suara Romo masih kedengeran lantang pisan.

Bacaan Injil minggu ini tentang Penghakiman Terakhir.

Ternyata gambaran The Final Judgement yang disampaikan Injil berbeda dengan pemikiran kita pada umumnya. Pemikiran kanak-kanak... dimana perbuatan baik dan perbuatan dosa akan ditimbang masing-masing menggunakan Neraca Keadilan. Yang lebih berat menentukan dimana "hidup" akan dilanjutkan.

Penghakiman menurut Injil bukan sekedar timbang menimbang yang baik dan buruk. Pelayanan kepada sesama yang hina & miskin lebih menyita perhatian-Nya.

"Sesungguhnya segala sesuatu yang kamu lakukan untuk salah seorang dari saudaraKu yang paling hina ini, kamu telah melakukannya untuk Aku."

Dia menyamakan diriNya dengan yang terhina.

Tiba-tiba saja imajinasi saya terhenti. Tak perlu lagi membayangkan Tuhan berada nun jauh di atas sana. Di atas langit. Di luar galaksi. Jauh tak terengkuh. Mulia tidak sama dengan jauh. Berdoa harus mendongak, siapa yang nyuruh?

Tuhan justru ada di bawah. Dia memilih berada di sana. Menjadi hina sama seperti kita.

Namun pada saat kita tergoda untuk terbang, bersenang2 demi kepuasan semata, kitalah yang meninggalkan Dia.

Pada saat sayap kita patah, kita jatuh, terhempas ke tanah, kita justru kembali bersamaNya.

Namun sayang, mata hati kita telah buta. Silaunya cahaya gemerlap membuat kita lupa akan indahnya gelap. Sementara dalam kegelapan jiwa kita, Dia rindu menanti kita mendapatkanNya kembali. Dia mengerti.. kita butuh waktu untuk mencari..

"Berapa lama waktu yang kau butuhkan, nak?

Semoga tak terlalu lama."

"..............."

Terjadi Lagi.................

2008-11-20T14:29:00.004+07:00

tak seharusnya kau kubenci
tapi akhirnya tetap kumaki
seonggok kuasa yang kau miliki
sering membuatmu tak tau diri

fakta di seputar semanggi
tak akan bisa kau pungkiri
terlalu banyak saksi-saksi
memantau kau bertransaksi

dan hari ini...
kembali kupergoki
kau sedang beraksi
korbanmu pasrah minggir ke kiri
terbayang....waduuuu kluar duit lagiiiiii !!!!!!

T.U.H.A.N

2008-11-19T11:32:00.004+07:00

Tuhan itu satu
Tuhan itu tunggal
Tuhan itu esa
Tuhan itu single

Tuhan itu sempurna
Tuhan itu mulia
Tuhan itu berkuasa
Tuhan itu segalanya

Jangan menggugat Tuhan, kar'na Tuhan ta' layak jadi tersangka
Jangan menyalahkan Tuhan, kar'na Tuhan ta' pernah salah
Kalo Tuhan salah, liat pasal satu (lhoo.... emangnya ospek???)

Jangan membedakan Tuhan, kar'na Tuhan hanyalah Dia
Tuhanku, Tuhanmu, Tuhan kita, ta' ada beda
Palingan cuma beda nama
Nama pemberian hamba, untuk Tuhannya

The Ironies of Life

2008-11-13T13:56:00.003+07:00

(dari milis tetangga)

Men:

All men are extremely busy
Although they are so busy, they still have time for women
Although they have time for women, they don't really care for them
Although they don't really care for them, they always have one around
Although they always have one around them, they always try their luck with others
Although they try their luck with others, they get really pissed off if the woman leaves them
Although the woman leaves them, they still don't learn from their mistakes and still try their luck with others

Women:

The most important thing for a woman is financial security
Although this is important, they still go out and buy expensive clothes and stuff
Although they always buy expensive clothes, they never have something to wear
Although they never have something to wear, they always dress beautifully
Although they always dress beautifully, their clothes are always just "an old rag"
Although their clothes are always "just an old rag", they still expect men to compliment them
Although they expect men to compliment them, when men do, they don't believe in them

Coklat

2008-11-13T10:32:00.002+07:00

coklat warnamu
manis rasamu
membuatku tak jemu
mencicip selalu

walau kadang ngilu gigi ini
ku tak mau peduli
seperti kata meggi
lebih baik sakit gigi
daripada sakit hati
(aiiih....dankduth kaliiiiii...)

coklat oh coklat....
mengapa rasamu sangat dahsyat
membuaiku begitu hebat
namun kuharus gerak cepat
meleng dikit..kau ludes disikat...

Seputar Semanggi

2008-11-12T11:05:00.003+07:00

kuliah di seputar semanggi

dari rumah jauh sekali

bangunnya kudu pagi-pagi

ngejar bus setengah berlari

nyampe kampus serasa mandi

gawe di seputar semanggi

bukan kar'na gengsi

atau ngga punya pilihan lagi

juga bukan demi reputasi

'mang ketiban rezekinya di sini

nongkronk di seputar semanggi

banyak yang bisa diamati

dari sergap tilang pak polisi

sampe hebohnya demonstrasi

tapi yang pasti ni.....

deket dari kantor siiiiiy ...... ;-p

KebahagiaaN

2008-11-08T22:31:00.003+07:00

Beberapa kali nonton "Golden Ways"-nya Mario Teguh, bagus juga. Apalagi host-nya Choki Sitohang... hehee....

Kadang terkesan naif, tapi banyak quotes Pak Mario yang mampu membuka mata hati dan pikiran saya, salah satunya tentang "Kebahagiaan".

KEBAHAGIAAN adalah "KEGEMBIRAAN" yang penuh "DAMAI" dan "KESYUKURAN".

Bila kita kurangi salah satu, maka kita tidak akan bahagia.

Karenanya, hanya orang baik yang dapat merasakan kebahagiaan.

Orang baik yang miskin, adalah orang kaya yang tidak banyak uangnya.

Orang kaya yang tidak jujur, adalah orang miskin yang banyak uangnya.

Siapa sih yang ngga mau bahagia? Kenapa kebahagiaan itu sulit didapatkan? Sebegitu langka kah si "Happiness" itu?

Penjelasan Pak Mario begitu sederhana..........

Have we thanked Him today ?

2008-11-08T15:54:00.008+07:00

Have we thanked Him..

For every breath we take
For every lil' step we make
For every beautiful and sunny morning
For every peaceful and silent night

For every praise that strengthens us
For every disdain that overturns us
For the blessings that lighten us
For the ordeals that fail us

Have we thanked Him for the good and bad in our life ?
Do we often forsake Him when we're up, and doubt His Glory when we're down ?
Even sometimes we judge Him too ruthless, and break His heart again...

For me myself, I'm starting to understand
That everything happens for a reason
No matter how great or terrible it is
We should just except what happened, coz we cannot go back and change it
And put our trusts into His hand
For He will not let us drown
Never will...

So, have we thanked Him today.... no matter what happens ?

Curhat Buat Sahabat

2008-11-02T11:49:00.004+07:00

(taken from Rectoverso by Dewi Lestari)

Sahabatku, usai tawa ini izinkan aku bercerita

Telah jauh kumendaki
sesak udara di atas puncak khayalan
jangan sampai kau di sana...

Telah jauh kuterjatuh
pedihnya luka di dasar jurang kecewa
dan kini sampailah aku di sini...

Yang cuma ingin diam... duduk di tempatku
menanti seorang yang biasa saja
segelas air di tangannya, kala ku terbaring sakit

Yang sudi dekat mendekap tanganku
mencari teduhnya dalam mataku
dan berbisik, "Pandang aku, kau tak sendiri, oh dewiku.."

Dan demi Tuhan, hanya itulah yang... itu saja kuinginkan..

Telah lama kumenanti
satu malam sunyi untuk ku akhiri
dan usai tangis ini aku kan berjanji

Untuk diam, duduk di tempatku
menanti seorang yang biasa saja
segelas air di tangannya, kala ku terbaring sakit

Menentang malam tanpa bimbang lagi
demi satu dewi yang lelah bermimpi
dan berbisik, "S'lamat tidur, tak perlu bermimpi bersamaku.."

Wahai Tuhan... jangan bilang lagi itu terlalu tinggi
Jangan bilang lagi itu terlalu tinggi...

Hidup Adalah Pilihan

2008-10-27T20:06:00.007+07:00

Life is a matter of choice... and it's goddamn true!

memilih tinggal, atau pergi
memilih melangkah maju, atau larut dalam pusaran masa lalu
memilih memaafkan, atau membiarkan terluka berkepanjangan
memilih berdamai dengan keadaan, atau bertarung demi perubahan

semua yang dijalani adalah pilihan
tak ada pembenaran
mungkin ada penyesalan
tapi itu konsekuensi, dari sebuah pilihan

Be Healthy with Lemon Therapy

2008-10-13T11:08:00.006+07:00

mau nyoba?

Be Healthy with Lemon Therapy

The function:
- Great Antiseptic..
mencegah munculnya bakteri2 patogen dlm tubuh

- Good for digestion..
mencegah gangguan pencernaan, kembung, sembelit, diare

- Wonderful stimulant to the liver..
merangsang hati untuk menghasilkan enzim lebih banyak dibanding makanan lain, menyeimbangkan kadar oksigen dan kalsium di dalam organ hati.

Try these:
- untuk tenggorokan sakit: peras 1/2 buah lemon dan campur dengan 1/2 gelas air --> gunakan untuk kumur-kumur.

- untuk luka memar / bengkak: tempelkan seiris lemon ke luka memar/bengkak untuk mengurangi/meredakan nyeri.

- untuk asma: minum 1 sendok makan jus lemon 1 jam sebelum makan.

- untuk gangguan hati: minumlah jus lemon dicampur 1 gelas air hangat, 1 jam sebelum sarapan.

- untuk gejala flu: campur jus lemon dengan 1 gelas air hangat, sambil merendam kaki di dlama ember berisi air yang dicampur mustard, tambahkan air panas ke dalamnya dan terus rendam kaki selama 20-30 menit.

- untuk meredakan heartburn: campur 1 sendok teh jus lemon dengan 1/2 gelas air.

- untuk rematik: campur 100-200 ml jus lemon yang sudah dilarutkan dengan air, minum 3x sehari, 1 jam sebelum makan dan pada saat akan tidur malam.

- untuk haid yang berlebihan: peras 1 buah lemon dan campur dengan 1 gelas air dingin, minum 3x sehari.

Nyapu..nyapu sendiri... nyuci...nyuci sendiri...nggosok...nggosok sendiri....semuanya sendiri.......

2008-10-13T11:00:00.003+07:00

Sejak libur lebaran, bibik di kos pulang kampung dan ternyata ga balik-balik lagi :( padahal kita udah telanjur cinta sama Mbak Mugi. Kerjanya rapi dan bersih, senang berbenah, kalo nyapu atau ngepel...kinclong bangets.... Mbak Mugi juga kayaknya punya indera keenam (hehee...) dan pinter misah2in baju penghuni kos yang sudah disetrika.

Kabar bahwa Mbak Mugi ngga balik lagi baru kedengeran bbrp hari setelah kita-kita ngantor lagi. Baju kotor udah numpukss, hampir seminggu ngga dicuci. Ibu kos sempat datang, nempelin pengumuman agar untuk sementara penghuni kos nyuci dan nyetrika sendiri. Bahkan Ibu sempet nyuciin piring kotor yang ditinggalin anak-anak di dapur, karena bibiknya ibu pun ikutan resign...hmmm.......Akhirnya tetangga kamar dan saya ikutan nempelin pengumuman, agar peralatan makan dicuci oleh masing-masing penggunanya. Kalau ngga... hmm.... bisa-bisa tikus ikutan ngekos juga.

Satu persatu temen-temen kos mulai sibuk mencuci... baju seminggu...yaaa...lumayan juga banyaknya :) Peralatan makan juga pada nyuci sendiri, walaupun masih ada beberapa temen
yang ninggalin piring/gelas kotornya.... ck ck ck.... susah bener dibilangin yah.....

Kalau saya? hehehe..... baju kotor (kecuali yang internal) diboyong lagi ke rumah :p nyucinya pakai mesin cuci aja dehh..... biar cepet kelar... hehe..

So, seminggu kemarin di kos ibarat lagu dankduth...... "nyapu...nyapu sendiri.... nyuci..nyuci sendiri.... nggosok...nggosok sendiri....semuanya sendiriiii.........."

"Ambulans" Wakil Rakyat

2008-08-25T16:05:00.002+07:00

Brisiknyaa....pagi, siang, sore, malem..mondar-mandir di Jl Sudirman.. ga kenal waktu lah pokoknya.
Ngaku-ngaku orang penting, tapi nyatanya cuma sekumpulan 'pesakitan' yang ngga mau dianggap rakyat jelata.
Berikut daftar nomor polisi untuk kendaraan 'bapak-bapak plus istri2-nya' (kemungkinan juga para gundik)..

RI 1: Presiden
RI 2: Wakil Presiden
RI 3: Istri/suami presiden
RI 4: Istri/suami wakil presiden
RI 5: Ketua Majelis Permusyawaratan Rakyat
RI 6: Ketua Dewan Perwakilan Rakyat
RI 7: Ketua Dewan Perwakilan Daerah
RI 8: Ketua Mahkamah Agung
RI 9: Ketua Mahkamah Konstitusi
RI 10: Ketua Badan Pemeriksa Keuangan
RI 11: Menteri Koordinator Bidang Politik, Hukum, dan Keamanan
RI 12: Menteri Koordinator Bidang Perekonomian
RI 13: Menteri Koordinator Bidang Kesejahteraan Rakyat
RI 14: Menteri Sekretaris Negara
RI 15: Menteri Sekretaris Kabinet
RI 16: Menteri Dalam Negeri
RI 17: Menteri Luar Negeri
RI 18: Menteri Pertahanan
RI 19: Menteri Hukum dan Hak Asasi Manusia
RI 20: Menteri Keuangan
RI 21: Menteri Energi dan Sumber Daya Mineral
RI 22: Menteri Perindustrian
RI 23: Menteri Perdagangan
RI 24: Menteri Pertanian
RI 25: Menteri Kehutanan
RI 26: Menteri Perhubungan
RI 27: Menteri Kelautan dan Perikanan
RI 28: Menteri Tenaga Kerja dan Transmigrasi
RI 29: Menteri Pekerjaan Umun
RI 30: Menteri Kesehatan
RI 31: Menteri Pendidikan Nasional
RI 32: Menteri Sosial
RI 33: Menteri Agama
RI 34: Menteri Kebudayaan dan Pariwisata
RI 35: Menteri Komunikasi dan Informasi
RI 36: Menteri Negara Riset dan Teknologi
RI 37: Menteri Negara Koperasi dan Usaha Kecil-Menengah
RI 38: Menteri Negara Lingkungan Hidup
RI 39: Menteri Negara Pemberdayaan Perempuan
RI 40: Menteri Negara Pendayagunaan Aparatur Negara
RI 41: Menteri Negara Pembangunan Daerah Tertinggal
RI 42: Menteri Negara Perencanaan Pembangunan Nasional/Ketua Badan Perencanaan Pembangunan Nasional
RI 43: Menteri Negara Badan Usaha Milik Negara
RI 44: Menteri Negara Perumahan Rakyat
RI 45: Menteri Negara Pemuda dan Olah Raga
RI 46: Jaksa Agung
RI 47: Panglima Tentara Nasional Indonesia
RI 48: Kepala Kepolisian Republik Indonesia
RI 52: Wakil Ketua DPR
RI 59: Wakil Ketua Badan Pemeriksa Keuangan

I'll Be Alright

2008-05-28T20:19:00.006+07:00

It's time for me to let You know
I am so glad that I have You
Through all these years
I am so thankful

Now that I've grown
I'll always be thinking of You
With all the things You taught me so
I always remember

I'll be alright, I'll be OK
I will be good learning along the way
All from the heart, these things I do
I'll make You proud because I love You

I'll be alright, I'll be OK
I will be fine and I'll be good all the way
All from the heart, these things I do
I'll make You proud because I do
I love You so

I will stand tall and I'll try not to fall
As I reach all of my goals
I will go on, and I will move on
All because of You
For You

(Sarah Geronimo)

Sang Tersalib...

2008-05-22T11:37:00.007+07:00

(Doa Di Hadapan Salib)

Sang Tersalib,
Bila aku lemah, Engkau menjadi kekuatanku
Bila aku jatuh, Engkau membantu aku bangun
Bila aku merana, Engkau menjiwaiku
Bila aku menangis, Engkau menghiburku
Bila aku menderita, Engkau menyembuhkanku
Bila aku bimbang, Engkau menjaminku
Bila aku memanggil-Mu, Engkau menjawabku

Sang Tersalib,
Engkaulah cahaya yang menyinari
Engkaulah matahari yang memanaskan
Engkaulah makanan yang memelihara
Engkaulah sumber yang menyegarkan
Engkaulah keindahan yang mempesona
Engkaulah kesunyian yang menguatkan
Engkaulah samudera tempaku tenggelam
Engkaulah jurang tempatku hilang
Aku mendapatkan segalanya
Dalam Sang Tersalib

Negara Mulan Jameela

2008-05-18T22:09:00.003+07:00

Baru aja terbangun gara-gara bunyi alarm handphone kekencengan, masih belum 100% sadar, ternyata ada acara menarik di salah satu channel stasiun TV swasta, John ‘Pantau’. Salah satu scene nya menayangkan beberapa orang yang diwawancara oleh si John. Dari yang tua sampai yang muda... Dari tukang ojheg sampai guru PPKN.
Pertanyaan si John ini... gampang-gampang susah... “Sebutkan Sila ke-2 Pancasila!” Hayooo… masih ingat ga? Dari 10 orang yang diwawancarai, hanya 3 orang yang menjawab benar, itupun setelah 2-3x ngulang jawab. Yang bikin saya agak amazed... si ibu guru PPKN itu pun tak bisa menjawab dengan benar... itu belum seberapa, cara si ibu ngeles... benar-benar bikin takjub...“Kita lebih menitik beratkan pada pelaksanaan Pancasila, mas... bukan teorinya...” ck ck ck... Gimana mo melaksanakan kalau teorinya aja ga tau? Dan yang ngomong begitu, GURU... GURU PPKn PULA!!! Satu kata yang terpikir di benak saya waktu itu cuma... BOBROK!!!

Scene lainnya hampir serupa dengan sebelumnya, hanya pertanyaannya diganti, “Apa judul lagu wajib yang saya nyanyikan ini?” Lalu mulailah si John menyanyikan penggalan terakhir lagu ‘Garuda Pancasila’. “Ayo majuuu..maju…ayo majuuu.. maju…ayo majuuu…majuu…”

Korban pertama adalah dua cowok berseragam SMU, dan mau tau jawabannya apa? “Aku seorang kapiten!!!” mhuahahahahahahaha.
Korban kedua lolos.... group band Coklat pinterrr.... sekali tebak langsung bener :b
Korban-korban selanjutnya sama dengan yang pertama, alias ancur pisan... sampai sekarang masih aja ada yang mengira lagu ‘Hari Merdeka’ itu judulnya ’17 Agustus tahun 45’…capee deee...
Nah yang terakhir nih… anak cewe imoet-imoet, palingan juga masih TK, bintang sinetron kalo ga salah (ga tau siapa), sukses nebak ‘Garuda Pancasila’ tapi ga tau lagi lagu wajib lainnya, dengan spontan dia mengaku, “Aku ga tau, aku bisanya nyanyi ‘Wonder Women’… lagunya orang-orang dewasa..” <<taelaaa….. umur lu berape, cong???>> Dan berkumandanglah lagu kebangsaan Mulan Jameela itu, “Aku buuukan wonder women mu yang biiiisa terus menahan…rasaaaa sakit karna mencintaimuuh…”

Prihatin ga sih…? Koq bisa ‘Hari Merdeka’ kalah ngetop dibanding lagu Mulan Jameela yang…jujur neh… NGGA BANGET GITUU LHHOOOHHH... Saya memang bukanlah seorang nasionalis sejati, tapi miris rasanya melihat kaum muda tidak lagi mengenal identitas bangsa sendiri. Dasar negara yang begitu sempurna dan mulia hanya dipandang sebagai teori belaka. Melupakan jerih payah tokoh bangsa, sementara selebritis dipuja-puja. Mungkin suatu saat nanti Indonesia harus ganti nama, jadi Mulan Jameela... Negara Keseksian Mulan Jameela.

.....Comfort Zone.....

2008-05-17T00:39:00.011+07:00

5 years and 11 months has passed by, and I’m still here… think less to hunt for other perfect places. Like a wheel, I’ve been up against great and dreadful moments. Got bored, saturated and desperate lots of time, but surprisingly there was always a change that made me chose to stay and did the best that I could.

It really broke my heart when I saw my friends left one by one. But don’t know why, I always feel that things will be better as time goes by, the wheel will take us to experience the wonderful moments over again.

People may say I’m so stupid, big coward… neglect good opportunities out there, but… good or bad is relative, isn’t? And I never regret it. Do I stay to long in a comfort zone?

Maybe I am… but in this place, I have become ‘someone’… strong and confident, reliable and sociable, discipline and persistent, dare to stand tall…I know now, how to appreciate ‘friendship’, ‘hard work’, and many more lessons of life.
Like Taylor Hicks said in his song, “I’ve learned to love myself in spite of me, and I’ve learned to walk the road that I believe”.

I realize I may change someday, perhaps there will come a time, when this place will no longer be my ‘comfort zone’, perhaps I will (finally) success to find another ‘delicious cheese’ :)
But until that moment, I choose to walk on this path… develop my abilities and personality.
Just as my best mentor ever said, “this is our ‘small shop’ that needs to be taken care of” :)

Well, here I will stand, till my time comes ………

Ilmu Cinta

2008-05-07T21:15:00.006+07:00

Persembahan dari sahabat terbaik...

Cinta bukan ABG
Cinta bukan romansa

Cinta...dari mata turun ke hati
mata untuk melihat
hati untuk memandang

Melihat dengan mata, telinga, bibir, kaki dan tanganmu
Memandang dengan Ilmu melewati akalmu

Bila Cinta hanya melihat
Maka Cinta itu buta

Bila Cinta bisa memandang
Maka orang buta pun akan merasakan cinta

**********************************************************************

Seberapa jauhkah pemahaman kita akan Ilmu Cinta?
Sudah mampukah kita memandang dengan 'mata' hati kita?

Fly Away

2008-04-29T20:11:00.004+07:00

"When will you be home?" she asks

as we watch the planes take off

We both know we have no clear answer to where my dreams may lead

She's watched me as i crawled and stumbled

As a child, she was my world

And now to let me go, I know she bleeds

and yet she says to me

You can fly so high

Keep your gaze upon the sky

I'll be praying every step along the way

Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart

I love you too much to make you stay

Baby fly away

Autumn leaves fell into spring time and

Silver-painted hair

Daddy called one evening saying"We need you. Please come back"

When I saw her laying in her bed

Fragile as a child

Pale just like an angel taking flight

I held her as I cried

You can fly so high

Keep your gaze upon the sky

I'll be praying every step along the way

Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart

I love you too much to make you stay

Baby fly away

I love you too much to make you stay

Baby fly away

(Corrine May)
******************************************************************************

Thanks for all you've done for me, mama....

I know you are hurt when you let me go... but I never think that you could be so bleed....

I'm sorry for every mistake I made... I'm so damn stubborn n selfish...

I always try to be a very nice person for my friends but fail to make myself a good daughter...

But please believe me, ma... you are the most important person in my life.... ever...
I love you, ma ......

Wasn't It Yesterday...

2008-04-28T22:38:00.005+07:00

Wasn't it yesterday
When we were just strangers, starting one journey to become friends
Wasn't it just yesterday
When we shared tears and laughters, sorrow and glee, never think about an end

Till one day, a chapter of life should be closed
And it seemed to late to realize.. where did the time go?
Why it went by so fast when hearts prefer to crawl instead?

For some moments, life was so blur, full of doubt and fears
Thinking that people we care about will no longer be around
That from this time forward, things would never be the same again

But people have their own fate anyway
Written clearly by The Almighty, remain uncertain for men
However we learned that some poems don't rhyme
And some stories don't have a clear beginning and end
Life is always about not knowing
Having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it
Without knowing what's going to happen next.

One thing for sure I keep in mind
That you and I will meet again
When we're least expecting it
One day in some far off place
I will recognize your face

I won't say goodbye my friend
For you and I will meet again

The 'Orsa' Introduction

2008-04-14T22:44:00.001+07:00

Ha... this is trully my 'orsa' post, since I've just encouraged myself to write lil' pieces of my life, which ,I do realize, is not easy to be maintained because of my 'moody' nature :)

What can I tell about me? Hmm..let's see...
I'm not an introvert person but not really the extrovert one. I prefer to listen than to be listened, but as time went by, I learned how to show what I really feel though I mostly wept thru those 'journey of life' :b
My friend once said I have everything inside me, i.e ... so complicated...hehe... vulnerable yet so lovable, have a strong ability to combine laugh, moan and normal cry :b, most of the time calm but can also be as energetic as 'kutu loncat' sometimes..
Reading is always be my major leisure pursuit. My recent favourite books are The Kite Runner and The Alchemist.

Lately, I become more realized that The Almighty always grant His blessing and never ever leave me alone :)

Curhat Colongan

Darling, I Do

A Prayer Away

A Chat with Jesus Christ...

Your name popped up on my screen, and my heart literally skipped a beat

It's Been Over a Year

Pergilah Kau

Suara Nurani

lima menit

Breathe Again

Forgiven, not Forgotten

Kutipan Sahabatku

The Final Conversation

Prayer

Rasa

Langitkuw Kelabuw

You'll Be In My Heart

Capek

yang artinya ....

Cape' deee....

Pundi-Pundi Sang Kacung

Ciledug

**NOT**

Leave Out All The Rest

Ulang Tahun Dara

IBU

Who-Ville Citizens

M.U

Dua Sahabat

Mahluk Ambisius yang Mutungan

Dreams

Jacob Bunardi

Resolusi 2009

...31 Desember...

Happy Christmas

Buntelan Maaf

The Man In The Mirror

Ngga boleh pake 'Haduh'....

Awanku.... Gulaliku.....

"Kamu lakukan untuknya, kamu lakukan untukKu"

Terjadi Lagi.................

T.U.H.A.N

The Ironies of Life

Coklat

Seputar Semanggi

KebahagiaaN

Have we thanked Him today ?

Curhat Buat Sahabat

Hidup Adalah Pilihan

Be Healthy with Lemon Therapy

Nyapu..nyapu sendiri... nyuci...nyuci sendiri...nggosok...nggosok sendiri....semuanya sendiri.......

"Ambulans" Wakil Rakyat

I'll Be Alright

Sang Tersalib...

Negara Mulan Jameela

.....Comfort Zone.....

Ilmu Cinta

Fly Away

Wasn't It Yesterday...

The 'Orsa' Introduction

NOT